They say this planet is 70% water.
That makes us all inmates, locked up in the floating confinements we call islands.
Moreover, we're also held captive by country, society, family, friends, and lovers—
all manner of prisons...
Sometimes of our own choosing.
Deep down, we wish to be prisoners.
We know that we cannot survive being free,
because it is an incredibly empty and miserable feeling.
And for that very reason, we yearn for freedom,
as we would a treasure in an adventure tale, one no man can obtain in reality.
To live is to continually be shackled by something.
So the only way to grant Kondo Isao true freedom
is to let him be executed—
So what, you're here to get in our way?
You want to be set free, hard-boiled style?
Vice Chief!
Enough with the dumb and dumber routine.
Change into this already.
Farewell Shinsengumi Arc Part Four
Prison Break
Only the most heinous of criminals enter,
Watch the Farewell Shinsengumi Arc in a bright room and at a safe distance from your TV!!
and only corpses leave.
Like Gokumon Island, it's a prison known as a living hell...
Kokujo Island.
This is the only way to infiltrate the place.
Basically, we'll sneak in by blending in with the prisoners.
You're not blending in with anyone!
Never mind prisoners, could you try to blend in with humans first?
This is why I told you to switch to a notebook. A placard is too conspicuous.
That's not the issue here!
This is why I told you to switch to a notebook. A placard is too conspicuous.
Why should I?! You match me and my placard!
There's other stuff you should be copying!
I refuse.
Your disguises and your hearts are in total disagreement!
We got this ship's crew on our side.
They wanted to put one over on the new government,
so they gladly agreed to help us out.
The real problem is the handover.
Prisoners on their way to Kokujo Island undergo a thorough check at sea.
We forged the documents, but in case they realize who you are...
It'd be quicker to capture them, ship and all, huh?
No need to worry.
Everything's ready.
Once we give the signal, the other units will move in.
The Shinsengumi and Katsura faction are working together.
It'll be over in an instant.
If we can just get that ship, we've won.
Then the only thing we'll need to do is pick up Katsura-san and the others from the designated spot.
You guys need to sort out your relationship first, though.
Oh, there's the ship.
Are you all ready?
Hang on a minute.
Let me smoke one last cigarette.
It's time to say goodbye to you guys, too, huh?
Thanks for everything.
I'm glad I was sent packing to your place,
because I got to find out that this country still has cops like you guys.
While I'm gone, take care of Edo.
And them.
They got dragged into this due to my incompetence.
Besides, in spite of what they're like,
Kondo-san would be sad if they were gone.
Vice Chief...
Neither they nor any of my men are as weak as you think.
Go raise some hell, hard-boiled style.
Even if you go too wild and have nowhere left to go,
you've got another boss right here.
The more a bad boy you once were, the better a sleuth you make.
Isn't that right, Haji?
That's mean, boss!
You didn't have to put it that way!
V-Vice Chief.
Something's off about that ship.
It's approaching us,
but I don't see anyone on it.
Hard rudder, port side!
Get away from that ship!
I-It's an enemy attack!
Hurry and provide backup!
C-Captain Okita!
Naraku?
Why are they here?
Kozenigata!
Hang in there!
Hey!
Guess I finally got to act like a boss for once.
If this keeps up, this ship will sink.
We'll handle things here.
You go subdue that ship.
B-But...
Are you gonna tell me the demonic vice chief can't leave an injured man behind?
Don't let me down, now.
I told you...
My friends aren't that weak!
The friends of a hard-boiled man
will all be hard-boiled.
Now get going already!
The cannons!
You fiends...
Looks like we made it in time for the party!
I couldn't go to the funeral!
So I should at least take part in the battle for revenge!
Or else the shogun could come back to haunt me!
And nobody wants that.
Do you guys realize what coming here means?!
If you come with us, you can never return to this country!
It's too late to go back, either way.
Looks like we've come too far, unawares,
to be the only ones turning tail.
If we do have anywhere to go home to,
it'd be a place where you guys are, too.
If we're going back,
then that hack policeman,
that hack terrorist,
that sadist,
and that monster are coming with us.
That's the kind of place Odd Jobs started calling home at some point.
Sheesh.
People aren't supposed to sit in one place for too long, huh?
Before I knew it, I was covered in moss.
Yeah.
True that.
Kondo-san, I'll be honest.
Until now, I saw protecting Edo as my job, and nothing more.
I just swung my sword because we were who we were: Shinsengumi and samurai.
But now, from the very bottom of my heart,
I want to protect Edo.
I want to protect our home!
Kondo-san, I've finally become
a proper member of the Shinsengumi.
Prepare for battle, men.
Once we arrive at Kokujo Island,
immediately begin hunting for the escaped inmates and their accomplices.
Sir!
That's it? That's our mission?
Complaining again?
You'd better give it a rest, or I'll start to sulk.
Don't we have other targets to cut down?
Do you really think Kondo and his gang killed the guards and escaped?
Who can say?
I imprisoned Katsura in the same prison on purpose.
I would find it rather troubling if they weren't capable of that much.
Was exposing Lord Nobunobu's tyrannical nature to the public
and sending Katsura to where Kondo was
all part of a plan to incite a rebellion and gain an excuse to purge them?
If I only wanted to wipe them all out, I would've had them executed with Kondo.
What I really want to clean up is
something far larger in scale that they happen to be a part of.
But before I could finish all the preparations,
your old friend seems to have caught on to me.
Oh, well.
This is a bit earlier than I'd planned,
but they were always fated to die out either way.
Let us as cops witness the demise of the police.
Hey, it's time to switch.
Oh, okay.
How's it look? Have the escapees...
Nah. It doesn't look like they've made it out of these walls yet.
Well, obviously.
Because we were thinking of getting out now.
I'm sorry, but continue to keep watch in your dreams.
That went well.
How are things looking on the outside, Matsudaira?
Wait, where's Matsudaira?
Uh, that's Pops!
Matsudaira! What are you doing wearing such confusing clothing?!
You're wearing the same thing!
Wh-What do you guys think you're doing?!
Hang in there, Kondo!
Let go of Kondo!
Uh, this is Kondo you're grabbing!
Just hang on, Kondo!
We'll combine our strength!
What are you combining?!
Combining stupidity with stupidity will only give birth to more stupidity!
What's wrong with you idiots?!
We nearly gave ourselves away!
Shh! Keep it down, Kondo.
That's not Kondo, damn it!
Crap.
Looks like the Mimawarigumi are here, too.
Toshi and the rest won't be able to approach the island now.
More than anything,
who knows if we can hold out until help arrives?
They will come for sure.
No need to worry.
They've got him on their side.
Just as you left your hopes outside these walls,
I left a trump card of my own back there.
Let us meet at dawn.
That man.
It's as we thought.
Something's going down over there, as well.
With the island on high alert, there's no way we can force our way through head-on.
We were right to abandon the big ship in favor of life boats.
Quit acting like you guys didn't go too wild and sink the ship!
Why do we gotta row all the way to the island?!
The situation's changing by the moment.
If you louts don't keep up, your general will lose his head.
You guys sure have it good, with your weird Chinese motor!
Put yourself in our shoes!
Don't tell me you guys are worn out from that little skirmish.
Come on. The war hasn't even begun for real yet.
I guess even the Shinsengumi and the Katsura faction together
are still no match for one measly little Odd Jobs, huh?
Row, people!
Forget about Shinsengumi and Joi Rebels for now!
Just work together and beat them to the island!
Time for the placards to shine, since they're shaped like oars. Use one like this.
I'll use my notebook to cheer you on, then. Fight!
Later, Vice Chief. We're going ahead.
Excuse us.
Wait a minute, you bastards—
Good grief.
Who would've thought we'd ever see something like that?
Right, Boss?
The Shinsengumi, Joi Rebels, and Odd Jobs
are all working together toward a common goal.
Just goes to show that life should be lived good and long.
So please don't think it'd be hard-boiled to die here, okay?
Let's live and see what those guys do with our own eyes.
Yeah. Guess I should hold off on drinking with dinner for once
and keep the champagne on ice.
I'll be waiting at the bar,
you perms.
Preview
No education, no status.
The only thing they can trust is their own swords.
Don't let their dreams consume you.
Farewell Shinsengumi Arc Part Five
We're gonna become samurai here in Edo.
Stray Dogs
What clever idea does Gintoki come up with
to breach the impregnable Kokujo Island's defenses?
Next week, a chaotic brawl breaks out.
And what's coming up right now...?
The Walker's Guide to the Galaxy
Episode 50 The Land of Samurai
Marsh Ian
Good day to all our viewers across the universe.
I'm your host, Galactic Essayist Marsh Ian.
Galactic Essayist Marsh Ian
Universe Map
Wherever the dart lands, be it the very end of the universe, we cover the place.
That's what The Walker's Guide to the Galaxy is all about.
Map of the Universe
As we celebrate our 50th episode, we'll be going to...
Earth!
Earth is a beautiful planet, with a wide variety of species.
Who's ruling it right now?
Joining the Coverage Again Mr. N, Editor
A quite scary species.
Until sixty million years ago or so, it was creatures like these.
What? They'll eat us alive!
And then it was creatures like these, or these.
What? We really will be eaten alive!
And right now,
it's ruled by EXILE.
What? They'll eat us alive!
Don't worry.
They mainly only prey on act*****s and mod**s.
Earth's Geological Eras Over 4.6 Billion Years
10 yrs. ago
6.5 mil. yrs. ago
450 mil. yrs. ago
EXILE Era
Titan Era
Dinosaur Era
They're a species that's beyond beautiful, and never eats more than it needs.
Wow. They look scary, but they're actually quite nice, huh?
Actually, they're quite naughty.
True, when we landed on Earth,
we found a whole bunch of EXILES.
Hello there, beautiful young lady.
Are you an EXILE?
I'm a B'z fan, damn it!
Snack Otose
She may have looked similar, but she wasn't an EXILE.
Owner of a watering hole we made a pit stop at. She helped us a lot.
Other than EXILE, Earth also has
a whole bunch of other species.
Sada Masashi
Everyone but Sada Masashi looks the same to me!
Earth Inhabitants
Things used to be a lot simpler back in the day.
What species ruled the planet before?
They're extinct now, but there used to be a species called "Samurai."
Samurai
Earth used to be full of terrifying monsters and rife with death,
but the legendary species, Samurai, restored peace to it!
But why'd they go extinct?
Due to the Unemployment Ice Age.
We'd love to cover them!
There's a fossil you can interview...
Where?
Right there.
Though it's a fossil of samurai poo.
Shaggy Hair
Dead-Fish Eyes
Filthy Piece of Wood
This is the legendary species, Samurai (poo)!
Huh? Interview?
Will I be paid?
Odd Jobs Gin-chan
Today, the Samurai (poo) is called a "handyman."
Instead of hunting, he takes advantage of others' weaknesses...
You took your mischief too far, lady.
Please don't tell my husband.
I'll pay as much as you want.
He's a lot like a hyena.
He primarily consumes nothing but sweets and alcohol.
He staggers on two legs during the day,
and turns four-legged at night.
Blech
His movements are sluggish, and there are days when he doesn't move at all.
That's a form of hibernation!
That's why he survived the Ice Age!
It's an unbelievable evolution!
In the past, samurai used to form rather unique herds,
with a hierarchical structure called "lordship."
Lordship
You'd have the leader of the pack, the "lord,"
and the lord's servants, the "retainers."
We'd given up on ever seeing that in its natural form, but...
That's "Queen" to you!
Haa haa
Queen!
So how'd it go? Are you an S or M?
Yes, the system of lordship was still in place!
I could hear your voice all the way outside.
You rotten pig!
Where were you goofing off?!
"Retainers" became "pigs"...
Look, they wanted to know where to have fun...
If you've got money to waste on that crap,
then pay tribute to the Queen of Kabuki District in the form of salary!
And "lords" became "queens."
The Samurai (poo) herd hierarchy is as follows:
On top is the queen.
Next up is her pet.
Then the fleas on the pet.
Then the roaches that eat the fleas.
Then the magazine for killing the roaches,
with which the Samurai (poo) comes as an accessory.
Further below is the hallucination he talks to every now and then.
Oh, Pachi-boy. Did you change your glasses?
You could tell?
It is said that Samurai trained diligently every day.
But our Samurai (poo) just loiters around gambling dens,
showing no signs of training at all.
Could it be that the Samurai (poo) species has declined massively in strength?
Hey, attack him and see what happens.
Wh-When?
Once he finishes eating that squid tentacle.
Squid tentacle?
Damn, this is tough.
It was an octopus arm!
Don't tell me, he noticed our presence and made the first move?!
Odd Jobs Gin-chan
Let's give it another shot.
We could try something like poisoning...
That's too dangerous!
You won't lose your arms with an indirect method.
All right. We're having takoyaki for dinner.
They showed up for dinner!
Not octopus again.
What do you mean, "again"?
I don't even want to look at octopus anymore.
Even the hallucination was digging in?!
Don't be selfish!
What a terrifying species.
They've evolved to a higher plane of existence than us!
Uh, weren't they just hungry?
Huh? You're not eating?
What happened to your arms?
Th-They were gone before I knew it.
Oh, is that so?
But they'll grow back, right?
W-Well, yes.
Nice.
Then if we keep you alive and just eat your arms,
we'll never run out of food, huh?
I need to go buy some nibs!
That species is definitely super-dangerous!
I must let the entire galaxy know, with my essay!
Your pen's flowing a lot more freely than usual.
We had to pack up our research midway through, but I've got no complaints.
I was just about to get tired of Earth's crappy cuisine, too.
I miss Planet Osaka's takoyaki.
Mr. N, is that...
Essay Manga Are Easy to Animate
Odd Jobs Gin-chan
Gin-san, the Farewell Shinsengumi Arc isn't over yet.
Are you sure you should be lying around?
You see, samurai are creatures that hibernate once they've eaten their fill.
Following the disappearance of an essayist,
a self-proclaimed editor was arrested.
Huh? Gin-chan, isn't this...
Under his shirt, he'd been tied up with a rope,
Galactic Essayist Marsh Ian Missing
and he kept making strange statements such as, "He'll grow back again, anyway."
Oh, man. There are some scary creatures out in space, huh?
"The Walker's Guide to the Galaxy" ends this week.
Thank you for all your support!!